Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize