I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
We have so much sex to catch up on
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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