I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
what day is it and did you see me today?
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
