but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
