I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
