OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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