You're my little dorito
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
