Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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