Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
