..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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