I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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