Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
worst night to have a conscience
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
