sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
