i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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