playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
