even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
