Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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