there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Randomize
