your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize