No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
