Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Randomize
