he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize