Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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