Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
