your room smells of hookers.
And success
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize