I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
