im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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