So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
