I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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