Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize