It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
