Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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