I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
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