Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
