Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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