The maid of honor just puked.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
