but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Randomize
