Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
