stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
