Barsexuality is the new black.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
