you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
