You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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