i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
