Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
