u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Randomize