quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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