shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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