This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
