Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
