I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
