Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
